And so, it is over….

It is at last over, the primaries, the election, the swearing-in and the bullshit. Or maybe not. Saturday, a beautiful sunny day here in my home town, then a trip down Main st., a protest march, food and fuel for the crisis manufacturers. I wondered what they could all be so afraid of. The signs had every manner of slogan about opposing hate, crime, supporting immigrants rights, and so-on. I don’t remember any of these things being an issue anywhere other than CNN news, at least not a real and present threat. This is a big country so there will always be assholes somewhere, but marches all across the country? Just because He won and She didn’t?
Here is what I think will happen….. wait for it…….nothing, nothing of consequence. I don’t know if Trump will be a good prez or not, I don’t think he will be able to prove himself either way with all the lamentation and whining. The news networks will feast on water-cooler gossip and any good that does come will be lost in the back pages. All that will float to the top is “grab them by the pussy”. Forget about Bill and his, stick your dick in it (and then repeatedly lie about it before the senate committee) or Hillary and her, Let therm die, I’m sleeping, policy.
I am just discouraged, not just with politics but the whole ball of stuff, work, life, faith, all of it. When I was a young man in the 80’s, life was different, jobs were easy to come by, I don’t remember anyone worried about the future, it was the last years of the Cold War and anyone I knew felt safe. Of course there were problems, not everyone prospered any not everyone became a millionaire. Some of my friends were the product of alcoholic homes (as was I), some tried their luck against the law. Mostly we just put one foot in front of the other. And that was all of us, didn’t matter what color you were, or what God you did or did not worship. For the most part we were one country. Today we are split almost down the middle (to say the least), and certainly, a house divided can not stand. If this divided house should fall, it will likely have nothing to do with even the lowest of politicians, it will be the fault of the people, a people divided. This country has most certainly lost it’s way, the Greatest Generation is nearly gone and there is nothing to take its place but mediocrity, we have replaced icons of greatness like Neil Armstrong with second raters like Pop stars and social hacks like Tess Rafferty and Michael Moore. 250 years ago, We The People fought the toughest country on earth and won, we survived a civil war, fought a war on two fronts against a prepared and highly motivated enemy to keep the world from falling into darkness and then put a man on the moon just because we could. Today we divide ourselves over where Bruce Jenner should be allowed to pee and what flag should be flown over an American college.
When did this happen? Not on a single day of course, but over a period of years. Years of limited struggle and expanding comfort. Gone are the days when (generally speaking) the bare essentials were a luxury. No one living today has know true want.

ON JFK AND THE HUMAN LIFE

This week, like many others I have been reading conspiracy stories surrounding the assassination of JFK. I don’t really know why, it just seems to run in phases. When JFK was killed I was about 2 years away from being conceived so it had to real bearing on my life. But for some reason, every time a show comes on TV I get that deer in the headlight look and can’t help but watch. In my lifetime a dozen movies, several dozen TV shows and hundreds of books of books have been released (not counting blogs and other internet stuff) each on claiming to have NEW NEVER BEFORE SEEN pictures, testimony and reenactments of every aspect of that day and the days following. This is total crap. As far as I can tell not one shred of new anything has come to light in decades. But still I, and a significant number of the population watches, or reads all of it.
Anyone who was old enough to remember can tell you where he/she was at that moment, just like I can tell you where I was and what I was doing on 9/11. I expect the same is true for most people who were around for major events in history, like Pearl Harbor and Lincolns assassination.
My question is why do we cling to conspiracies? I think that, at least in the case of JFK, no one wants to believe that a little nobody could take out the biggest man in the world. I also think that most facts are college level boring, while a good story is always a good story and fires the imagination, as well as our fears.
I recently started watching a movie called 11/22/63 by Stephen King. Long story short, a random guy has a magic closet that takes you back to the same time and day, about 3 years before the assassination, his friend takes on the responsibility of going into the closet and stopping whomever is the killer, because (wait for it) if JFK doesn’t die the world becomes a utopian place…….or something like it. This is another common thread is conspiracy stories, most anyway.
Because JFK was killed while a sitting president he suddenly became a martyr, “oh, the things he might have done if…..”. I am not so sure. I think that, had he lived he would have been relegated to obscurity like most presidents, he might be remembered for the missile crisis, and maybe the bay of pigs. The simple fact is that there is no solid evidence that he would have done anything any different than anyone before of after.
So did his death have any real affect on life as we know it? I don’t think so. Not long term anyway. Aside from political investigations and book publishers, I think the ultimate effect of the assassination was small and short lived. The next day the mailman still brought the daily stack of bills and everybody still had to go to work, the price of gas went up and down, rain fell and snow was falling somewhere. History has a way of unfolding regardless of our actions.
Years ago I was all about the possibility that JFK might actually have been shot by all, or any of the following suspects, Oswald, Castro, the Kremlin, CIA, FBI, the Masons, Illuminati, the Boy Scouts, aliens, bigfoot or even the ghost of Shakespeares brother-in-law Frank. Today I am pretty convinced that a frustrated ex-marine named Oswald did it, alone. Not only that, it would have been fairly easy, even more-so when you understand the kill shot was delivered at only a mere 88 yards. The shows that come out now are the most entertaining, witnesses being interviewed about an event that one second was just a planned visit by a popular president and the next (frame 313 of the Zapruder film), utter chaos, shots, echos, screams, cars racing, people diving for cover, police uncertain of what exactly happened running or driving in several directions. These people are being asked to stick their hand into a laundry basket of memories and pull out the EXACT pair of socks they were wearing at that moment. Hours after the fact, eyewitness accounts were varied and conflicting, memory is a funny thing. Add to this the chance of being seen on TV, everyone gets their 15 minutes of fame, so we are told. Now fast forward 50 years. Of course it was a big event, but memory is very fluid. Last Sunday maybe you had ham for supper, or did you? No that was Mondays lunch, it was a roast, we always have a roast when your folks come to visit….. but they came 2 weeks ago…
Today I am more interested in the conspiracy stories themselves, the variety, the depth, the seemingly endless effort people will put into pulling at any straw they can find. Many of these people are true believers, they believe that a cancer patient named David Ferry played a pivotal part in the worlds biggest cover-up. At worst, they are gold diggers plying their trade at the expense of the fearful and paranoid. As for myself, I was a true believer, now I have been around long enough to have seen enough bullshit come and go that, while some conspiracies are true, most are just crap generated by mostly the media and authors who cant think of a better way to make a living.
I love all conspiracy stories, who killed king Tut? What really happened at Roswell? I even read one about the Titanic that had savvy ship owners towing the damaged sister ship out ahead of Titanic so they would collide, sinking both and the insurance would cover both. Pretty cool huh?
So will I be glued to the TV the next time a 2 hour “special” comes on promising real proof of what happened at Dealey Plaza? You can bet your ass I will.

The elections are over, thank God.

So its been about three weeks since the election, we all know who won.
I have been around long enough to say “I have been around long enough to remember… (fill in the blank)” I have seen a bunch of Popes come and go, 12 presidential terms,never mind the names, just the 4 year terms. In all those years, for the most part, we read in the paper (pre-internet)and then headed off to work. The sun rose in the east, set in the west, rain fell, birds crapped on your car, the whole bit. Not much changed. After the oath of office, pretty much the same, maybe with a tax hike or two. The general economy rose and fell as it always has and always will, trash day would come and go and so on. Oh sure, there would be grumbling, another constant. But not on the scale we see today.
Today, literally today and for the last 3 weeks the lamenting is of Biblical proportions. Riots (maybe real, ,maybe hired) vandalism, fear, panic, the death throws of those who cant cope. College students need “safe” zones from people who disagree with them, a college took down its American flag for being “divisive”, people are openly predicting the end of humanity and the beginning of the end times. The guy hasn’t even taken office yet. A fellow member of a club I belong to let us know that members of the LGBT community are soon to flock to gun shops to defend themselves…… from what is unclear, but they are in dire need of firearms just the same. Today we have cities that will give safe haven to potential murderers and terrorists, now that’s a good idea. I think that most of the people who support this notion don’t live anywhere near those places, I wouldn’t. Groups like BLM want “cop free zones”, I worry for the victims of this one, because if I were an EMT, I wouldn’t go anywhere that puts me in more danger than the criminals that will be loose on the street.
In my 51 years I have never seen a country so fragmented, and I am willing to bet that it has not been since the civil war. We are nearly out of Americans, we have a surplus of hyphenated Americans, white-americans, african-americans, italian-americans and so on. We need to get over ourselves. A rumor says that Ben Franklin said “If we dont hang together, we shall surely hang separately”. Dunno if he said it or not, doesn’t matter, it’s true.
I suggest this, winners and losers alike, stop gloating, stop whining, stop being hyphenated, get a grip on reality. You are no more special or ordinary than anyone else, try thinking beyond yourself. Anyone can be part of a problem, they are easy to pick out, they follow mobs. If you are receiving state or federal aid or tuition, dont bite the hand that feeds you, those hands are attached to myself and anyone else who gets up in the morning and goes to work whether they like it or not and pays a tax rate they had little or no say in.
Drop the hyphen, every one. Try being just a plain American for a while, then if you still think America is so bad then pick another country, go there and work to make that place even better, it’s win win.

Surgery +6

This is old news now, Its December.

Its a good thing I didnt try to go back to work today. I thought I might be able to but, nope. For the last few days I have felt pretty good, not counting the belly tenderness. Today however has not been so great, bloat, tummy ache, the thought of food repulses me. After a call to my Doctors office and a conversation with the nurse, I was reminded that it will be several weeks for my guts to learn their new, non-gallbladder job and I may have days like this again for a bit. Dammit. So it looks like I will live. Watch for fever (none) redness or leaking from the incisions (none) is all I have to be very concerned about and dont forget my follow up appointment. Fine, ok, not dying. Yesterday was great, felt good, ate well (perhaps to well) and caught up with two old friends I had not seen in almost 5 years, a good reconnection.

Note to others: If you have had your gallbladder removed, big laughter hurts. If you hear a funny joke, feel a sneeze coming on or see a bump in the road ahead, hold your tummy like pregnant women do, it helps.

No, Mass. does not need stricter gun laws. The reason is that as far as I am aware no gun law passed has saved a single life. Gun laws, like it or not only affect those who obey the law, criminals by definition are not obedient to the law. At best restrictive gun laws only disarm citizens who pose no obvious threat to anyone. In Orlando, it was the system that failed, I have read that the gunman (a licensed security guard, was investigated by the FBI on at least three occasions, he is said to have also made threatening remarks to fellow employees, however, the employer did nothing. I am sure this is due to the gunman’s ethnicity, anyone other than this man would have been unceremoniously fired and the possibility exists that this terrible event would never have taken place. Lawful gun owners take their responsibility very seriously, disarming them serves no one. The greater threat is that certain politicians have taken this opportunity to advance their own agendas, apparently oblivious to the fact that those innocent people are dead, and more may die yet. This to me is an exercise in abject vulgarity. The focus should be on the killer and what could have been done to head this off, speaking again of the FBI and the killers employer. Is it not the job of the FBI to not simply identify potential terrorists, as the man certainly was, but deal with the threat they pose? The media is as much to blame as these vulgar politicians, they spoon feed the public faulty statistics, badly researched information and parrot anything these politicians say. This is not journalism, this is as much of the problem as politicians who capitalize of other peoples suffering. Politicians, anti-gun groups and the media would have you believe that anyone can walk into the corner store, grab a 30pack and a machine gun right off the shelf without so much as a glace from the store clerk, these people are as much the problem as anything by spreading lies to people who dont have the time or the inclination to do their own research of the facts. If anyone is interested in unfiltered facts, I suggest the FBI UNIFORM CRIME REPORTS, pretty dry stuff put together mostly for other law enforcement agencies, or people who already know what they are looking for. It contains all the stats for every manner of crime in the US and some of the world. Politicians and anti-gun people never read this because it doesnt support most claims. In short, no gun law would have prevented this tragedy in Orlando, (he was after all a security agent) however, action by at least two agencies could have. This does not mean that I favor unrestricted gun sales, quite the opposite, no one I know objects to background checks, this is just good policy. If you dont already know, the purchase of a firearm is preceded by a call to the BATF to insure the purchaser is allowed to buy a firearm. In Mass. a license to carry is required, as is a basic safety course for new licensees. All of this is reasonable, and anyone who willfully uses a firearm for an unlawful purpose should at least be investigated and appropriate action taken.

What to believe in

There are times when I ask myself what I believe in, usually times when the inside of my head is a mess. I wonder who I am, like everyone does, and I wonder is this all that I am?

So what do I believe in, here in the 21st century……hmmm…… I believe in a creative force greater than myself that I chose to call God, I dont always get along with my God, but I still believe. I believe in working for what you want and if you are not willing to work for it than you have no claim to it. That’s right, I am a hard boiled conservative. I believe the best cure for crime is the armed citizen. I also think that the greatest threat to this, or any country is the media, we don’t have journalists anymore, we have shock therapy reporters who couldn’t care less about facts. I believe the second greatest threat is politicians, they are friends with the media. I believe in the old saying “all things in moderation” when applicable, I am an alcoholic so one this one I have to be selective, booze was stronger than myself so out of my life it went. I also believe in following doctors orders, moms belong at home at least until junior goes to school (to many kids are just growing up and not being raised), children should be planned, birth control is cheap. I believe that just because someone is rich, it doesn’t make them at-fault for anyone elses  failures, that’s just jealousy. I will cut down the “I believes”, you get the idea. Rocking chairs and comfy beds are almost always a cure-all for the common sucky day. Film is better than digital (unless your a pro and your living is at stake), vinyl makes the best table cloths. Don’t be a cheap tipper. There is life beyond earth, I just cant imagine why they would travel all this way to mutilate cattle and buzz the same mountain top for generations. Free rides make people weak. Hamlet should be read by everyone.

Box cameras and other 19th century wonders.

Last year I built an Afghan box camera, I saw some youtube videos about them and decided to give it a try. It worked! The basic idea is that this thing is an instant camera….. thats right folks, pictures while you wait. You are working with photo paper, no film needed. the first pic is taken much like any pic with an old camera, then you develop it right inside the body of the camera, but working with photo paper your first pic is a negative, next step, take a pic of the first pic, that creates a positive. And push-pull, click-click (extra points if you recognize that) you have a genuine old school photograph developed by hand. The whole process takes about 10-15 minutes. I used a light meter to calculate the exposure (with a real glass lens), on a sunny day, about 3 seconds. This is as manual as it gets, completely hands on. While I wouldnt want to earn my living doing this, there is something about being so intimately involved in the whole process, skill is gained on the fly, no Photoshop to save your bacon, and every pic is an original.

The pic included with this is of the back of the camera, turns out I dont have a good pic of the whole thing yet. The other is of the lens itself. I look forward to taking it out on the road this summer, will certainly turn some heads.

On hobbies and other disorders

I listed in an earlier post a short list of some of my past hobbies. The most recent is picking up my old cameras again, and making Ebay rich buying other old cameras and related do-dads. Among my favorites are my Pentax Spotmatics and Polaroid land cameras. The polaroids are great if you have never used one. They were cutting edge once upon a time. Fiji still makes the film for them although they discontinued B&W 2 years ago.

Recently I tried to make a flash delay for a polaroid, I wanted to use an electronic flash in place of the old flash bulbs, which while still plentiful for now will eventually go the way of the dinosaurs. Long story short, I failed. I couldnt make the Arduino thing do what it needed to do. This forces me to admit that much of modern tech has left me behind. I should have just found a 12 year old to do it for me.

As I age I dont want to be one of those old people who talks about the “good ole days” . I like to think I can stay somewhat current, while still having a healthy appreciation for the past. Time will tell. I have lived long enough to see my father in myself. As I have said, my dad was a good guy but not the man I want to be. He seemed to have stopped “keeping up” in the fifties. His whole philosophy on everything about him was WW2 era. Not a bad thing exactly, but he lacked the skills to relate on any level with me as I grew up during the 70’s and 80’s. He thought pot was called pop.

I started this over a week ago, I have no idea now where I was going with it. Its Saturday afternoon, T has a migraine and is napping. I am a bit lost, In feel like I should be doing something but then again, nope.

The X Files

So, episode 6 of “season 10” is over…. What a rip off. I was expecting something but not, yet another, cliff hanger, at least not one this big. For a year I was pumped over this, and now….. oh the pain.

Let me back up a bit. I was, and still am an X Files nut. When the show was new I didn’t have cable, I would record the show at my parents house on my way to a meeting then on the way back pick it up and I and my then girl friend would watch it. It sounds simple but it was a pain in the ass. I had all the posters, really, all of them taped to my living room walls. I was 30 years old, divorced, had child support payments, the whole bit and there I was hanging posters like a teenager. Years later I was given the box set and have seen all the episodes at least three times, probably more. The box set is great, because I missed the very last episode, I screwed up setting my parents VCR that one time. I didn’t see the final episode for maybe 8 years.

So to be clear, my favorite episodes are what Chris Carter called the “monster of the week” shows. The global conspiracy, alien hybrid thing was ok but I could never really buy into it. In a world where you cant get two politicians to cooperate the whole thing sounded like BS and the idea that only one man really knows whats going on was skimpy, a dry run for Red Reddington. The romance between Scully and Mulder….. well, I could have lived without it but it came with the series so what the hell. What drove me the most crazy was Mulders quest for his sister, I get that she was a hole in his life but how many times can you watch Mulder scream “What have you done with my sister, you bastards?!”. By about the middle of the series I had grown a little tired of Mulder and his whining. By the time Mulder left the show I was glad to see him go. The show seemed to be stalling out a little, and when Robert Patrick and Annabeth Gish came on, to me, it took a major upswing and started to come more alive. Sure the whole shadow government thing came along too and there was Scully’s baby, but to me the show got better with Mulder gone. Incidentally, when I finally did see the final episode of the last year, it was a total let down, more Mulder and his search for the truth. The truth is that a conspiracy  of the size he was talking about would have involved hundreds of thousands of people to maintain it. Tell me how the Smoking Man kept all those people from getting drunk and talking to much.

I really liked both movies, well done, both of them. Now here we are in 2016. The last episode of the 6 part mini series ends in a super cliff hanger, the kind that just screams sequel. Are we to wait for another movie? More episodes at some unknown time? I still am not crazy about the global conspiracy but it is what it is and I am hooked. Buzz on the net is that Chris Carter is waiting to see what the response is and that will determine what his next move will be. I am all about squeezing every last penny out of anything but this was just wrong. I can see a teaser for something else but this is to much. Ignoring the fact that many shows have been launched that have only a run of maybe 12 episodes at most, and that many old movies are being recycled in modern times (a definite sign that Hollywood is running out of steam) this sort of thing is just blatant baiting. Now we all have to sit and wait for the big shots to decide how soon and in what format the next bait and switch comes along. Sooner or later Gillian and David are going to retire, die or what ever, a little resolution would be nice. I would still watch the Monster shows even if they only came out sporadically, but not a super-cliff hanger. Dammit, ok, I an just whining, but c’mon, those guys are killing me. And on top of it, Smoking Man isn’t dead? We all saw him get blown up by that helicopter. I admit, cutting out while Scully was on another bridge, looking up at what may or may not be another alien ship was clever. Sigh….. will this madness never end? I hope not. S

Good Ole Dave

Today I learned that Dave the parts guy from my local parts store is retiring at the end of the month. This came as a crushing blow. He has been selling me parts since I was 17, thats a long time. Dave has seen me through at least half a dozen cars and trucks, countless side jobs for other peoples cars, he has also seen me through one wife, one divorce, four girlfriends and I dont even know how many of lifes issues. Over the years I spent many hours down in the paint room (where he was to be found most of the time) talking anything from politics to “what is Gods name is wrong with that woman”. Dave was always a voice of calmness and wisdom to me, being older than myself he had seen many of lifes events and survived, he had a story for every occasion and dry wit covering all topics. I make it sound like he is dead but far from it. He lives a mile or two away in the same house he has had for ever, I even redid his garage roof back when I was contracting. I can visit any time, he said so himself. But he wont be THERE, at the store, selling me parts and asking how my daughter is doing. He was at all time a surrogate father to me, ( my dad was alive until three years ago, but we had a different relationship, not bad, just different ).

Of the top five life changing events in my life, he was one, listed here not in order; my marriage, my divorce, the birth of my daughter, dropping out of high school and meeting Dave when I was 17 and I had my first car, a 1963 Cadillac sedan de ville. My dad had bought it fourth-hand from old MR. Drew at the gas station down the street and when he bought that old blue Buick, he gave the Caddy to me.

Parts stores today are not what they once were, like most things, they are more like Walmart. A clearing house for cheap parts of dubious quality at prices that are only modestly lower than the privately owned competitors. Such is life. Dave would dig through the old books he had kept to find the original part numbers to old parts for my old cars and trucks, the same he did with everyone who came in. Parts stores today dont even have books, they arent needed, not as many people drive old shit boxes anymore so for the vast majority of customers, the kid at the counter who couldn’t tell a windshield wiper from a control arm, it works ok. But this is why Daves work station always had a line and the other two guys working the counter had time to read HotRod magazine or talk on the phone with the wife or whoever.

The last two weeks have seen a bunch of lifes events happen, nothing unusual, just a lot at once, my mom fell at home and is in the hospital, now my sister and I have decisions to make about her future, heating season is hear, not enough money and too many bills, you know the drill. Daves retirement is a little like the straw that broke the camels back, I will live of course, but this marks the end of an era in my life. I won’t bother using that store again, with Dave gone I can go anywhere and get the same service.

Dave, you will be missed, thank you for being a great parts guy and extra dad. S